Treasure Hunt

“It’s going to take more than words,” she said.

I acknowledged the sentiment with something along the line, “of course, I realize this.”

But internally, my mind raced.  Words are my domain. Words are my way. I can communicate with these, and with such distance between us, how else should I pursue? I’ve rarely been so sure of what I wanted, but to complicate matters, I’ve also rarely been so unsure as how to obtain such. Of course want I want is nothing to obtain… not a prize, not a trophy, but nevertheless a treasure.

“It’s going to take more than words,” she said. And my heart felt a prick against it… as what was said was like my kryptonite, my weakness. It was taking away my strength, and I was once again a mere mortal.

And suddenly I feel foolish, because I’ve not even heard her own words… those precious gems that I value so much. I had been blinded somehow and for a week she has been so detailed, so meticulous. She had taken my verbosity and one-upped me. She is no prey, but I somehow am not a predator either. A dream she has dreamed, an effect she has caused, a bubble she has broken; she has reminisced on rules and relationships, and alliterated like a Pentecostal pastor.  And I ask her what’s going on, and obtain her answer of little consequence. I know there is so much more, and I’m determined to break the lock of the treasure chest, somehow—for what heart does not lie in a chest?

I can’t find the key, but if it exists, I’ll search it out. I’m not just words, I swear. I’m not crazy, I swear. I’m not every other man, I swear. Every word is backed by its weight in gold, and I dare her to cash them in.

This chase is foolish to my logic, but I frankly don’t care. My pursuit may indeed be destined for failure, but if I don’t pursue this treasure, my heart will be cursed forevermore. This is not even the main quest, but the start of it. I must have this treasure with me, and together we may press on, press upward. Further up and further in.

I’ll put on a happy face

I say I’ll wait with a touch of grace

But I wonder aloud about this chase

And wish we were in one place

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4 thoughts on “Treasure Hunt

  1. stephenbaker says:

    As far as I can tell, I’ve been in an identical spot. Certainly, language is power; it lets people like you and me feel more secure than we deserve.

    Unfortunately, words are ultimately a means to the expectation of action.
    You’ve got the authenticity to pull it off, I think.

  2. […] Excerpt from: Treasure Hunt « WordFlyer…Josh. […]

  3. Beth says:

    Okay- I stumbled upon your blog a few months ago and became completely engrossed in it. The tales of your love for this person capture me. So, I finally came back after not letting myself because I felt like I was spying and yet, I want to know more. I long to know what happens because your words are so poetic and your devotion to this woman is so lovely. Thank you for sharing them.

    • wordflyer says:

      You may or may not see this comment, but I’ll oblige. thanks for stopping by. While my posts may be personal in nature, they are public for a reason (not that I know the reason, mind you).

      I, too, long to find out how things resolve. I’m still in pursuit, but there’s little left I can do. Either it shall be requited or not at this point–and I await a decision on her part. It’s a tough scenario from my perspective, but equally difficult for her. The distance is no obstacle to trifle with in our circumstances. But I think it’s worthwhile…

      Feel free to come back; in fact, I hope you do.

      Do you have a blog yourself?

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